Guy's Column

*What are the boundaries of flirting when you're in a relationship?* After overstepping these bounds many times and regretting it (and a few times not), I must say that relationships are a tricky business when it comes to classmates. I'm in a class that siphons out every spare hour in the day, and I happen to be working on a group project with the girl who doesn't look too bad when she wears next to nothing in the springtime. Yeah, she knows I have a girlfriend, but she never asks about her or brings up anything at all related to relationships. I think she might even have a boyfriend, but haven't asked. We're working diligently on our project, and she comes over, puts her hand on my shoulder, and asks if we need to just screw this and all go out for a drink. Sounds like a great idea to me! Heck, it's a stressful class, and we're friends and all. We're out having a drink, technically as just a stress reliever, but really (for me at least) as an excuse to hang out and see if this girl has a naughty side. Not that anything would happen, but it's important to at least explore this option. There's nothing more fun than knowing a girl wants to get with you. So that brings up the current topic of this column what is the limit for flirting? From what you've read so far, the only thing that can be taken as flirting is suggesting the idea of unwinding after some hard work. Co-workers do that all the time, even when they know there's no chemistry among anyone. So what's the problem? Here's what I think the real deal is it's not flirting in itself that is mischievous, it is the thought behind it that counts. If you ask yourself this question every time you're flirting with someone of the desirable sex, "Would I sleep with them right now if there was no way I would get caught," and the answer is yes, then, well that's a good thing as long as you don't get caught! But that's also a sign that things could be more serious than you think. Look at it this way I'm completely okay with my girl having all sorts of fun hanging out with the guys in her class, as long as she doesn't actually like them. If they're playing nude Twister I don't want to hear about it. As long as she doesn't actually like them. But the moment she starts to get attached, and starts worrying whether so-and-so is going to call to hang out, that's when the line is crossed. I think we should encourage the idea of 'friends without boundaries' with colleagues, as long as they remain friends and don't become lovers. Once either person makes that move to say that they're interested, it ruins the whole damn thing. You have to keep it respectful and a bit mysterious. Because really, isn't there just a bit of a game to the whole process anyways? Who doesn't enjoy a challenge or a chase? _submitted by an anonymous guy_ delicious | digg | technorati
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